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FenCon III - Dallas, TX

Mid-September found me playing close to home - Fen-Con, a literary & filk convention held in the Holiday Inn at the intersection of I-35 and I-635. As is my usual practice with local conventions, I checked into the hotel on Thursday, got settled, had a nice dinner with Jamie Boughen, and confirmed that the hotel was in no danger of losing the award for Most Uncomfortable Beds Of The Year.

Unlike last year, there were no hurricanes marching up from the coast, and I was able to enjoy a leisurely start to the first day of the con that didn't include keeping one eye on The Weather Channel and worrying about friends in the immediate path. And a fun day it was. My first program item was a panel called "Making Dreams Come True", an examination of how involvement with RenFaires, the SCA, LARPing, - and dare we say Fandom? - can influences our writing and everyday lives. Sharing this panel with Musical GoH Heather Alexander, last year's Filk GoH, Leslie Fish, the delightful Cedric of The Bedlam Bards, and fellow writer Rie Sheridan made this one a grand start to the weekend.

The panel line-up was almost the same - swapping out Rie for The Brogdigian (or however the heck it's spelled) Bards - for my next panel: "Filking For Fun & Profit" I didn't so much moderate that one as toss up a question and duck. It was lively, informative, and great fun.

George arrived just before Opening Ceremonies, bringing supper and making sure I went into the rest of the evening fortified and beveraged. And it was a fun "rest of the evening". I moderated a panel called "Insult To Injury", in which Bev Hale, Melanie Fletcher, and a dragged-in-to-help-out-blessim Lawrence Watt-Evans shared rejection letters we've received and sent Then, instead of going off to bed like a reasonable person, I stayed up to catch The Bedlam Bards in concert. What can I say - I'm a groupie!

Up early, if not terribly bright-eyed, for a 10am autographing, followed immediately by "Creating A Song", a panel that put me again working with Alexander, Fish, and Cedric, and moderated by Filk Hall of Famer Margaret Middleton. You'd better believe I was taking notes like crazy. A short break, then it was off to "Suckers For Love", a panel on vampires as the sexy romantic hero. This one included Steve Wedel, P.N. Elrod, Libby Singleton, Jane Archer, and Charlee Jacob. Then another short break before "Remembering Admiral Lord God Ma'am Sir", an hour of telling stories about FenCon II's Fan GoH, the late Judith Ward. Tears and laughter in equal proportions, and I was honored to have been able to share some of my stories about a very great lady. After a bit of recovery time, George, Jamie, Glen and I caught an early supper in the hotel restaurant, and finished in time for my last panel of the day, "Guilty Pleasures", wherein several of us confessed to fondnesses for various movies and TV shows. A good time was had.

Another early call on Sunday - this time for a reading shared with Brad & Sue Sinor. We traded off between us to good effect, and I used the opportunity to try out some works-in-progress. Then George and I packed out of the room and checked out of the hotel before my last two panels - "The Role of Traditional Religion is SF&F" with Linda Donahue, Bev Hale, Angelina Hawkes, Julia Mandala, Gloria Oliver and Steve Wedel, and "Disabilities and Technology in SF&F". Then we put the lid on FenCon III at Closing Ceremonies, and George and I booked it for home.

Many good conversations, much laughter, good sales in the dealer room, and a good weekend all around.

Archon 30 - Collinsville, IL

The closer the calendar came to Getaway Day for Archon 30, the more things kept changing, and the more I worried that this was going to be the most wheel-surly trip of the year. The airport transport chain that had a perfect-to-date record of getting me where I needed to go when I needed to be there pulled out of the St. Louis market two weeks before I was due to be there. The one remaining purveyor of wheelchair tranport - at roughly twice what bipedal passengers paid - suddenly discovered, two days before I was to arrive, that regulations forbade them from transporting out of Missouri and into Illinois. (Bless 'em, they kept on it, and worked out an arrangement with another company to handle things,) And the only accessible route between the main hotel (the only one in the immediate area with workable accommodations) and the convention center, appeared to involve a long around-the-block trip, assuming sidewalks and cut-outs. (I'm told the footbridge shortcut worked admirably for non-wheelie attendees. On the upside, I was going to have help. Although George cooldn't make this trip, Jamie Boughen was going, and was willing to be Stand-In Handicapped Travel Assistant and Stunt Sherpa. We were even on the same flight, and the nice folks at American Airlines Special Services arranged for us to sit together. No guts, no glory, as they say, and I was off.

The travel gods were definitely with me on this one. George handed me off to Jamie at DFW, we enjoyed a short, comfortable flight, and the reuniting of me with my wheelchair was among the fastest and most efficient of any I've had. Baggage collection also went smoothly. But the miracle of the day occurred when we arrived at the transport company's kiosk. We'd been told that the arrangements they'd been able to make involved a near-two-hour wait for the wheelchair van; we'd been checked in all of ten minutes when it arrived. For that alone, I was willing to forgive the fact that the driver got lost, giving us an unplanned hourlong tour of back roads and assorted scenic small towns on the Illinois side of the Mississippi River.

We finally arrived, safe and sound, at our destination, with Jamie being dropped off at his hotel before I was offloaded at the Holiday Inn. Check-in went smoothly, and I was, in short order, tucked into a very comfortable handicapped smoking room with a definitely comfortable bed. Very shortly thereafter, Jamie was at my door and we took advantage of the several remaining hours of daylight to scout the terrain and available routes.

Multiple happy discoveries: good sidewalks and cut-outs once I got through the parking lot of the Holiday Inn and up to road level, and a route that was about a 10th of what I thought I was going to have, thanks to a paved passage between the back parking lot of the restaurant nearest the hotel and the side parking lot of the convention center. Also good sidewalks and cut-outs (and no crossing of streets, to multiple other restaurants. And the happiest discovery of all, one of those restaurants was a White Castle. An icon from my formative years, a bona fide guilty pleasure, and the first one to which I'd been in strike range for more than a decade. Jamie, being the adventurous Aussie that he is, was willing to try something new, so we secured a couple of sacks full of little hamburgers and headed back to my hotel for supper and decompression. The term "comfort food" definitely applies.

Jamie headed back to his hotel mid-evening, and I took care of the unpacking I hadn't done yet. After checking email via the hotel's excellent - and free - wifi net, I snugged down in that aforementioned very comfortable bed and went happily comatose for a blissful nine hours.

I awoke at 7am on Thursday, well-rested and hungry. So I threw on clothes and headed down to the hotel's restaurant to use one of my free breakfast coupons. The layout wasn't all that good for wheelies - steps down to the breakfast buffet - but my server was cheerfully willing and I was shortly tucking into solid and tasty fare, and she was pocketing a generous and well- deserved tip. Then it was back to my room for a leisurely shower and getting ready, and the trip over to the convention center.

Registration began at 3pm, but Les Haven had Pro Check-In up and running when I arrived at 2:30. In short order, I was badged, had time to scout the locations of the rooms I'd have panels in, and had hooked up with Jamie. Then it was time for my first panel. "SF&F On TV", a discussion of whether genre fiction on the tube was always doomed to be "cult". George R.R. Martin had apparently been delayed, but the rest of us - Barbara Hodges, Sandra Morrese and I, took the ball and had a fine hour with the surprisingly large, especially for the first panel of the con on a Thursday, audience. Immediately following that was "Once Upon A Time: Fantasy and Fairy Tale - Is It The Same Thing?" Elizabeth Moon was slated to moderate, but she'd also been delayed in arriving (she made it about halfway through the panel, to much rejoicing and warm welcomes), but Mel Tatum picked up moderator duties and led Peter Bradley, Brent Chumley, Mickey Mueller and me through a lively discussion. Another dash across the convention center to moderate "Electonric Rights: Are They Being Too Literal?" with Haley Elizabeth Garwood, Robin Wayne Bailey, Rich Zellich, and Barbara Hodges, followed immediately by Opening Ceremonies.

Jamie and I took advantage of the break in my schedule to grab a hot-dog and chips supper from the little store in the convention center. Then I slid into the audience for "Finding Serenity", a "Firefly" panel before going back to work "Vampires and Werewolves and Things That Go Bump In The Night" had good panelists - Judi Cook Elizabeth Donald, and Cheryl Medley, a packed room, and the absolute best moderator with whom I've ever worked - Richard White. It was great fun.

It was now midnight, and I still had to make the trip back to the hotel. I'd done it in daylight, and I had my little Maglite in my purse and Jamie walking flank, so I wasn't too worried. As it happened, the street lighting was good and made the flashlight unnecessary, and I was soon back in my room and nose first in the pillow.

Friday morning, I awoke rested and ready and blessing Les Haven's name. Yes, he had scheduled me robustly (thank you, Les!), and far into the night, but he'd not scheduled me early. A little writing, another leisurely get-ready, and I headed over to the Convention Center to meet up with Jamie and for another busy day. It kicked off with "Wielding the Red/Blue Pencil", a look at editing and editors with Lynn Stranathan, Howard Jones, and Ruth Souther. Lynn did a fine job moderating, and the hour went very well. Immediately followed by "Funny Bones - Humor in SF&F" with Jeff Bohnoff & Keith Berdak, a well-attended and laugh-filled panel. I took advantage of a break in my own schedule to hit the dealer room, drop off CDs at the Yard Dog table, and pick up my Coupons Of Great Value (the dealer room had just opened). Then I took further advantage of the break and attended the play, "Pirates Of The Carribean: You Don't Know Jack", which was highly amusing.

Then it was back to work for "Tales Of The SFWA Musketeers", with Elizabeth Moon, Robin Wayne Bailey, and Selina Rosen. A little low-impact fencing interspersed with talking about the EMF and the Musketeers. (We're hoping to do a full-up demo at next year's Archon 31 NASFiC.

Instead of doing the banquet, a few folks headed off to the nearby Ponderosa Steakhouse to wrap ourselves around dead cow. Very tasty and reasonably priced, and the conversation was good. I'd hoped to get back in time to catch Elizabeth's post-banquet GoH speech, but I slid in a bit later than planned. And I knew the minute I arrived that something was wrong. Just before the banquet, news had reached us of the passing of Wilson "Bob" Tucker. There were many there who had known him for years, and folks like Robin Bailey and Keith Stokes, with whom he was especially close. I honestly don't know how Robin managed to carry on as ToastMaster as well as he did, other than Robin in a pro, in multiple senses of the term.

By now it was almost 10pm, and I'd have much rather be with friends and acquaintances who'd been hit hard by the news and in need of cofort. But I had one more panel to do - "Writing Realistic Weaponry" with Shane Moore, Mike Oliveri, Dev Hanke, and Richard White. Things got off to a shaky start - I've got nothing at all against tetosterone, but it took a while for the toxic levels in the room to settle down to a reasonable level. Otherwise, a good panel, and working with Richard again was fun.

Parties were going hale and hearty when I got back to the hotel, and getting up to my room was a bit of a challenge. Fortunately, most of the partying was on other floors besides the one I was on, so I did manage to get to sleep promptly. Which was a good thing, since the following morning's preparations were a little less leisurely than those previous.

The day started with my half-hour reading, held in the hotel, and to which no one came. Then it was over to the convention center for a half-hour's autographing, shared with Selina Rosen and other folk I knew. I expected to sit idly, but such was not the case. I had folk coming up steadily throughout the time, including one woman who had copies of Snows of Darkover and all three Sword and Sorceress volumes I'm in. Quite a treat that was.

Something almost unheard of was now stretched before me - a whole unscheduled afternoon. So Jamie and I grabbed a quick lunch from the convention center's food stand - in my case, a really yummy polish sausage and sauerkraut on hot dog bun - and then I hit the dealer's room. Looked at many lovely things, visited with folks I knew from other conventions, and spent some money. Bought two gorgeous swasher shirts, one for myself and one for George. Then it was dinner at Zapata's, the restaurant whose parking lot had provided me that blessed shortcut. So-so food and abysmal service. But at least I went into the evening well fortified. Because it was going to be a busy eveing.

From 6pm - 8pm, it was the Yard Dog Traveling Road Show. We Yard Doggies were a bit thin on the ground for this one - fewer of us at the con than usual, and with two hours to fill, we pitched in harder than usual. Elizabeth Moon, not a Yard Doggie herself but willingly helping out her comrades in need, pitched in and displayed a sense of physical comedy and slightly risque wit that was a hoot to watch. I "interpretive danced" so much more than usual that I would have killed for a masseuse the next day. And, in all honesty, I enjoyed that Road Show more than I have in a long time.

Straight from there to a panel called "Hitler in Oz and Other Bad Ideas": Ruth Souther, Selina and me talking about some of the worst ideas we've seen across our editorial desks or otherwise in print. It was actually a good bit of fun. That was followed immediately by a panel called "Science Fiction Theme Songs", which I moderated, with Mel Tatum, Barri Baumgarner, and Mark Tiedemann. Mark, who's a musician as well as a writer, and I had a particularly good time disagreeing on movie and TV scores and how effective they had been. Another good bit of fun.

I was done for the day, and almost done in. But betwen me and my bed lay various challenges. Saturday night was THE party night at Archon, which made the parking lot of my hotel, aka Party Central, a real obstacle course. I managed to make it to the front door without being flattened, but a couple of times, it was a near thing. Which brought me to the obstacle course of many bodies, many of them iniebriated, making a solid mass between the front door and the elevator. Loud music coming from one of the dances made the usual "excuse me" unhearable, and I finally had to resort to "Make a hole!" at full field-herald volume. A young, leather-clad wall standing immediately in front of me at that point, who'd managed to not feel gentle pokes with the end of my cane, levitated a good two feet, landed facing me with a look of complete astonishment, and then turned several shades of red as he moved himself and half a dozen others out of my way with a heartfelt "Ma'am, yes ma'am!"

It turns out I got to my room just in time. The next morning I heard that the hotel had shut off all the elevators "for repairs" shortly thereafter

I had nothing scheduled on Sunday, so I did another leisurely morning, giving particular attention to much time spent with hot water pounding on my very sore muscles. By the time I got over to the convention center, people were making their departures. I did one last round of the dealer room, collected cash and unsold CDs from Lynn at YDP, and sat in on Closing Ceremonies. Jamie headed up White Castles to secure us supper (you think I was going to miss my last chance for a while?) which he brought back to my hotel room to be eaten in blissful near-exhaustion. After he left, I packed and prepared for homeward travel.

My first Archon was enjoyable, and I'm looking forward to next year, when the St. Louis folks host NASFiC.

SoonerCon - Oklahoma City, OK

Despite being named for a well-known convention once held in the same city, OKC's SoonerCon, held mid-July, was a first-year convention. And while I support the notion of supporting first-year conventions, and have attended some that were solid right out of the gate (Panda*monium in Norman OK comes to mind), this one had its problems. The focus was mostly on comics, which was most evident in the dealers' room - where the only purveyor of books was Yard Dog Press - and the programming - which was lit-light and included some truly unfortunate panel mixes. And while the hotel rooms at the Bricktown Plaza were wonderfully inexpensive, clean, and surprisingly comfy, the hotel itself was handicapped-indifferent and just wasn't set up for conventions. Its idea of two panel rooms was a curtain (and we're talking fabric on poles here) down the center of their green-and-white linoleum "ballroom" floor. Talk about taking me back to my wicked youth and playing in honky-tonks! On the plus side, the absence of a restaurant was covered by a group who catered lunch and dinner: tasty, plentiful and nicely budget-conscious. And the concomm gets high marks for enthusiasm and friendliness, and working, with quiet dispatch, the problems that cropped up.

It looks like they're going to try it again next year, in another hotel that appears, from its website, to be a better convention venue. Depending on where they take the focus, it just might be worth giving another try.

Trinoc*Con - Raleigh, NC

Three days after screaming in from SoonerCon, we were screaming out again, this time headed for Raleigh NC and Trinoc*Con. Having attended this one several years running in Durham, I was interested to see how things would go in a new hotel and a different city. And, except for minor glitches and one major one (the main restaurant was not open for dinner), it went pretty darn well. The hotel got high marks for finding workarounds to problems and being responsive to issues.

I was scheduled fairly lightly, which gave me plenty of time at the dealer tables shared with Jana Oliver, Laura Underwood, and Tony Ruggieri. I love merching, and much enjoyed time spent back-of-table talking with David Hartwell and Bud Webster, whose tables backed ours. And, as always, time spent with Jana and Laura is always enjoyable.

Among the other highlights: taking a role in K. Laity's radio play "Con-Eire" and nearly laughing myself sick, sharing an autographing session with the gallant Gene Wolfe, multiple fun conversations with a whole raft of folks from StellarCon (if the con is anywhere near as much fun as the people I talked to, an invitation to come play would be most welcome); getting to panel on both Violence and Sex For Writers (and in the proper order, too!), and enjoying a concert by Three Quarter Ale. A splendid time was had.

Conestoga 101010 - Tulsa, OK

After another three-day turnaround, we found ourselves heading for Tulsa OK and Conestoga 101010, the gala celebration of the 10th anniversaries of the convention itself, Meisha Merlin Publishing, and Yard Dog Press. Given that I've had work published with both houses and was a former ToastMistress of the Con, I went into this one with a robust schedule and high hopes for much fun.

And fun was had. I participated in "ambushing" con co-founder Randy Farran with a group rendition of his infamous "Do Virgins Taste Better" at Opening Ceremonies, shared a nicely-attended (at 10am on Saturday yet!) Humorous Fantasy reading with Deborah Millitello, and co-auctioneered both the Charity and Art Auctions with the sartorially-resplendant Jim Murray. The charity auction, to benefit the Royal Gauntlet Birds of Prey Education and Rescue organization, brought occasion for something I will remember to the end of my days: having a gorgeous hawk named Valkyrie on my hand for a deliciously long time, and calling the last item of the day with her comfortably there ensconsed.

Unfortunately, it was not a trouble-free trip. The hotel, which has hosted Conestoga for several years and recently went from being a Sheraton to being a Radisson, had significant problems getting it right in accounting and especially at the front desk. One particularly surly desk clerk, about whom nearly everyone had horror stories, is likely responsible for my ending up in a room way-too-close to the Con Suite and the publishers' parties held there.

Saturday night I got hit with something I haven't had in ages: a noise-and-stressed- induced, throw-up-my-toenails, Please-God-Let-Me-Die, off-the-scale migraine. The combination of that, not being able to get to sleep until an hour before I was supposed to get up, and still having pain meds in my system come "show-time" forced me to the very rare action of blowing off my schedule for Sunday. Promotional-opportunities intensive panels, too, and I'm still not happy about that or what necessitated doing it.

ArmadilloCon - Austin, TX

As much as I enjoy them, conventions are about business, and attending - or not attending - is a business decision. So it was that, when the programming schedule for this year's ArmadilloCon was released, I looked at it and weighed the out-of-my- own-pocket expenses of gas, hotel room, food, and incidentals against having no panels, and nothing at all on either Friday or Sunday. Added to the fact that, in a break with long ArmadilloCon tradition, much of the uncharacterically-lightweight programming had gone to people with few or no professional credits. In terms of business, not attending was a better decision, and I made it.

L.A. Con II WorldCon - Anaheim, CA

Things got off to a somewhat shaky start when it took nearly an hour to get my wheels under me, thanks to baggage handlers who insisted they were under no obligation to gate-deliver the thing, and then delivered and abandoned it at a deserted gate halfway down the concourse. Things got even shakier when it took 3 hours and intervention by the convention's hotel liaison (Thank You, TR! I owe you!) against a front desk crew that made the surly jerk in Tulsa look like the soul of helpfulness. We ended up on the party floor, but either the rooms were better soundproofed or the parties far less raucous, because we slept divinely and had superb housekeeping throughout.

As for the convention itself, I had The World's Most Perfect Programming Schedule: twelve programs nicely spaced out, choice assignments, and with incredible co-panelists. At least two of the Programming Committee have worked with me before, so I suspect it was a case of knowing my strengths and putting me where needed. Whatever the reason, it was grand fun at every turn.

Among the highlights:

- a "Vampires In Literature" panel shared with the impressive Sean McMullen, always-a-sweetie Charlaine Harris, and the delightful Paula Guran. Vera Nazarian moderated, and did a right good job at it. (We got the chance to visit with Charlaine several times over the course of the con, and thoroughly enjoyed the company of this wonderful lady. If you haven't yet read her "Sookie Stackhouse" series, you're missing a treat.)

- moderating "You Killed My Wash. Prepare To Die" with Mary Kay Kare and John O'Halloran. A controversial topic among fans of the 'verse, a packed audience in one of the huge panel rooms, and diverse opinions among the panelists: yes, it was a little like driving an 18-horse hitch using sewing thread for reins. I had more fun than should probably be legal.

- somehow managing to hold my own on the "Humor, Patische, and Parody" panel with soon-to-be-Hugo-winner Peter S. Beagle, soon-to-be-Campbell-Award-winner John Scalzi, editor Stanley Schmidt, and the multi-talented Maya Kaathryn Bonhoff, who did an excellent job of moderating with one-liners and banter flying all over the place. At one point, Peter looked at me and said, "We're working up a comedy routine the next time we do a convention together" to which I could only reply, "Yessir.". And Stanley and I had, verbatim and after he cracked up over something I'd said, an exchange we first had a few years ago at another convention: Him: "Why haven't you sent me something." Me: "I don't write hard SF". Him: "Start."

- moderating "What Is It About Buffy?", and getting to work with the legendary Jacqueline Lichtenberg and the sparkling Jane Espenson. What fun those ladies are to panel with!

- lots of meals and enjoyable conversations with folks like Tom and Jan Hise, Harriet Culver, Team KC In '09, Eric Gerds from DAG Productions, the Creaseys from Random Factors, authors John Barnes and Lawrence Schoen (the latter kindly coming to my reading and very kindly laughing in all the right places), and a whole raft of others. (Hey, I've slept since then!) Getting the Mike Resnick Treatment - bellydancers! - during a signing stint with Selina Rosen at the Meisha Merlin table. Being introduced to Tim Minear and him recognizing my name (good thing I was sitting down!).

The return flight and logistics went flawlessly, a fine finish to a wonderful WorldCon.


Poet

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